I survived the weekend...whew! It was actually a pretty ok weekend...a little stressful, but ok! My hardest night was Saturday night when I made pizza and cookies for the kids. I was fine until my husband sat right in front of me eating. Ugh. Oh well, I am going to have to learn to accept it and get over it.
I had to buy a new pair of jeans today. We have several events coming up this month, and the only pair of "going out" jeans I had were falling off of me. I bought a size 16. I think it's been about 2 or 3 years since I've bought that size!
Other than that...nothing new to report!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Day 11 - Weigh In and Cravings
Oops, sorry for being absent last night. My life is catching up to me and I'm a little stressed right now. I work too much.
Today was my second weigh-in. I was down another 6.5 pounds and 2.5 inches, making my total loss for less than two weeks 13.5 pounds and 5.5 inches. Can I get a whoop whoop??? My coach was very encouraging tonight, as I had a very bad day today. Basically I'm craving sugar. Anything sugar I could get my hands on. I wouldn't care what it was. I had to run to the convenience store this morning, and I admit I browsed the candy aisle. It was classic angel on one shoulder, demon on the other. Suffice it to say, the angel won and I walked out without candy. It's the small victories that matter sometimes. My coach was very encouraging, and told me to have an extra packet to keep cravings at bay, even if it meant I had 2 restricted packets in one day. I'm glad she told me that. I'll remember that next month when the sugar cravings hit again.
I didn't feel much like cooking tonight. Honestly, I was just plain lazy. I was playing WOW (if you don't know what that is, don't worry, it just means you're not a big nerd like I am) and didn't feel like getting off my duff. So, it was sandwiches all around, including me. I made bread out of my broccoli cheese soup packet, and it was FANTASTIC! As a soup, that stuff is nasty, but as a bread for some turkey, it's rather tasty! I could eat it plain, without turkey and mustard and all the veggies I put on it. I think I may have a new lunch item.
That's about all for now. I have 3 extra kids in my house this weekend. My two girls ages 6 and 2, and we are babysitting for some friends. They have 3 girls, ages 1, 3, and 5. Wish me luck.
Today was my second weigh-in. I was down another 6.5 pounds and 2.5 inches, making my total loss for less than two weeks 13.5 pounds and 5.5 inches. Can I get a whoop whoop??? My coach was very encouraging tonight, as I had a very bad day today. Basically I'm craving sugar. Anything sugar I could get my hands on. I wouldn't care what it was. I had to run to the convenience store this morning, and I admit I browsed the candy aisle. It was classic angel on one shoulder, demon on the other. Suffice it to say, the angel won and I walked out without candy. It's the small victories that matter sometimes. My coach was very encouraging, and told me to have an extra packet to keep cravings at bay, even if it meant I had 2 restricted packets in one day. I'm glad she told me that. I'll remember that next month when the sugar cravings hit again.
I didn't feel much like cooking tonight. Honestly, I was just plain lazy. I was playing WOW (if you don't know what that is, don't worry, it just means you're not a big nerd like I am) and didn't feel like getting off my duff. So, it was sandwiches all around, including me. I made bread out of my broccoli cheese soup packet, and it was FANTASTIC! As a soup, that stuff is nasty, but as a bread for some turkey, it's rather tasty! I could eat it plain, without turkey and mustard and all the veggies I put on it. I think I may have a new lunch item.
That's about all for now. I have 3 extra kids in my house this weekend. My two girls ages 6 and 2, and we are babysitting for some friends. They have 3 girls, ages 1, 3, and 5. Wish me luck.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Day 9 - Not Much
Well, there really isn't a lot to report today. Same old, same old! It is definitely getting easier to be on this diet. Foods really don't bother me, unless I get too hungry, and then I want to cheat...but I haven't and I will not!
I tried the Walden Farms Creamy Bacon dressing today at lunch. Gross. I think I'll stick to olive oil and seasonings. That seems to be the best, especially with a little onion cut up in my lettuce. I have a weird palate sometimes. :)
I know I should stay off the scale, but it's hard. I haven't lost anything for 2 days. It does not bother me, because I know it's working and catching up from the big loss I just had. I am excited for weigh-in day, though! I will also get to measure inches, and I am very excited to see what those numbers look like.
I'm still fighting nausea throughout the day. I'm going to talk to my coach about it this week when I talk to her on Thursday. It had only been bothering me in the evenings after supper, but now it seems like it's more often. For example, today at work I got very nauseated around lunch time and had a hard time choking down my salad and pudding. I'm sure it will go away, but it's kind of annoying right now!
I tried the Walden Farms Creamy Bacon dressing today at lunch. Gross. I think I'll stick to olive oil and seasonings. That seems to be the best, especially with a little onion cut up in my lettuce. I have a weird palate sometimes. :)
I know I should stay off the scale, but it's hard. I haven't lost anything for 2 days. It does not bother me, because I know it's working and catching up from the big loss I just had. I am excited for weigh-in day, though! I will also get to measure inches, and I am very excited to see what those numbers look like.
I'm still fighting nausea throughout the day. I'm going to talk to my coach about it this week when I talk to her on Thursday. It had only been bothering me in the evenings after supper, but now it seems like it's more often. For example, today at work I got very nauseated around lunch time and had a hard time choking down my salad and pudding. I'm sure it will go away, but it's kind of annoying right now!
Monday, January 23, 2012
Day 8 - Week and Weekend
Day 8 is over, folks. It's getting easier by the day. Since today was my official one week "anniversary" of starting Ideal Protein, I decided to weigh. I'm down a total of 11 pounds! Woot!
This weekend was spent at my mom and dad's house, as previously mentioned. It was HARD. Not only was the food hard, but my grandma was there, and her comments and observations were HARDER. She asked me how the diet was going, and I told her I had lost 7 pounds so far. Instead of a congratulatory response, I heard..."Well, yeah, you've lost 7 pounds, but you have a long way to go. Then how are you going to keep it off?" That set the mood for the entire afternoon. I served soup for the family and tried to be normal and social, but my family was staring at me (or at least it felt like it). I sat in the other room with my daughter and my husband, but watching those two eat while I was starving was awful. I finally locked myself in the bedroom...and cried. For 20 minutes. Probably not the most mature thing to do, or the best way to handle the situation, but I didn't cheat, and that's all that matters to me. When I finally did eat, all I heard was negativity about the food I was eating. Suffice it to say, I was crabby and glad when everyone left. On a side note, I had the vegetable chili for supper that night...it was delicious!
Sunday was a much better day. My husband and I took a mini road trip to get some Walden Farms dressings for me, and when we left, he did drive-thru at a local fast food joint. It did not bother me at all. Now that I'm home, it's all good, and I have restored confidence and motivation. I have to let what others say go in one ear and out the other. I know I can and will do this...but for the life of me, I can't understand why some people think this is such a bad thing, or that I will not succeed. Well...guess what naysayers....I WILL DO THIS!
This weekend was spent at my mom and dad's house, as previously mentioned. It was HARD. Not only was the food hard, but my grandma was there, and her comments and observations were HARDER. She asked me how the diet was going, and I told her I had lost 7 pounds so far. Instead of a congratulatory response, I heard..."Well, yeah, you've lost 7 pounds, but you have a long way to go. Then how are you going to keep it off?" That set the mood for the entire afternoon. I served soup for the family and tried to be normal and social, but my family was staring at me (or at least it felt like it). I sat in the other room with my daughter and my husband, but watching those two eat while I was starving was awful. I finally locked myself in the bedroom...and cried. For 20 minutes. Probably not the most mature thing to do, or the best way to handle the situation, but I didn't cheat, and that's all that matters to me. When I finally did eat, all I heard was negativity about the food I was eating. Suffice it to say, I was crabby and glad when everyone left. On a side note, I had the vegetable chili for supper that night...it was delicious!
Sunday was a much better day. My husband and I took a mini road trip to get some Walden Farms dressings for me, and when we left, he did drive-thru at a local fast food joint. It did not bother me at all. Now that I'm home, it's all good, and I have restored confidence and motivation. I have to let what others say go in one ear and out the other. I know I can and will do this...but for the life of me, I can't understand why some people think this is such a bad thing, or that I will not succeed. Well...guess what naysayers....I WILL DO THIS!
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Day 4 - Weigh In and Resturaunts
Day 4 is in the books. Another day closer to goal. Even though I just started the program on Monday, I had my first weigh in today so that I could get on schedule with my coach. I lost a total of 7 pounds and 5 inches. I have to say...I am so extremely proud of myself. Today I had a bad day at work. I was so stressed out when I left, and I drove past Dairy Queen. I was tempted. Very, very tempted. But....I drove on. I just had to tell myself....7 pounds....5 inches....over and over again. It's so stupid, and I felt ridiculous. I guess I'm an emotional eater after all...even though I never considered myself one before.
My oldest daughter K is on a precision dance team, and the team preformed at a basketball game this evening. OMG...so proud of her. I actually had tears in my eyes watching her. She is so grown up. Anyway...afterwards, everyone was starving, and since it was our supper time, we decided to go out to eat. We went to a local steak house, so I felt like I had a good selection of foods that I could eat. I ate my salad plain...which was fine. I really, really wanted shrimp, but decided to ask how it is cooked. Turns out when they grill it, they use butter. Darn it. So, I had a steak. It wasn't bad at all, even without sauce...after I sent it back to have it cooked again. Last time I checked, a medium steak does not bleed. Ew. I also had to pass on the steamed veggies...because they cook those in butter, too. But...I had green beans....and had to pick out the bacon, but they were very good. I'm proud of myself for watching my family eat bread, fries, and potatoes...and sticking to my guns. I did have to take a big whiff of the bread though. It smelled so good! 7 pounds....5 inches....7 pounds.....5 inches. :)
This weekend we go to my mom and dad's house for the weekend, so I may not update. Thankfully, she is on the diet too, so we will have each other for support when the rest of the family is pigging out on yummy stuff. We've planned our meal, and she has lots of lettuce and veggies on hand.
If I don't update again before the weekend...I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend! IP, baby!
My oldest daughter K is on a precision dance team, and the team preformed at a basketball game this evening. OMG...so proud of her. I actually had tears in my eyes watching her. She is so grown up. Anyway...afterwards, everyone was starving, and since it was our supper time, we decided to go out to eat. We went to a local steak house, so I felt like I had a good selection of foods that I could eat. I ate my salad plain...which was fine. I really, really wanted shrimp, but decided to ask how it is cooked. Turns out when they grill it, they use butter. Darn it. So, I had a steak. It wasn't bad at all, even without sauce...after I sent it back to have it cooked again. Last time I checked, a medium steak does not bleed. Ew. I also had to pass on the steamed veggies...because they cook those in butter, too. But...I had green beans....and had to pick out the bacon, but they were very good. I'm proud of myself for watching my family eat bread, fries, and potatoes...and sticking to my guns. I did have to take a big whiff of the bread though. It smelled so good! 7 pounds....5 inches....7 pounds.....5 inches. :)
This weekend we go to my mom and dad's house for the weekend, so I may not update. Thankfully, she is on the diet too, so we will have each other for support when the rest of the family is pigging out on yummy stuff. We've planned our meal, and she has lots of lettuce and veggies on hand.
If I don't update again before the weekend...I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend! IP, baby!
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Day 3 - Measurements and Food
Day 3 was sure a change! I had to FORCE myself to eat. I was not hungry at all today. Crazy change! If I have to force myself to eat over the course of the diet, I will definitely do well! :)
I noticed today on the way to get my daughter from school that I drive right by a Daylight Donuts. I didn't even know this town had one! Funny that I never noticed it when I could run in and get one....or two.
Even though I just started this diet on Monday, I have to weigh in tomorrow, and then Thursdays will be my normal weigh in days. Since I have to get up super duper early, I got measured tonight (hubby is doing it). If his measuring is correct (which we are both questioning) I've lost 5 inches. Oh well. I have an idea of what my weight will be in the morning. Let's just say I can't wait for my first weigh in. I'm actually excited to get on the scale. Yup, I said I'M EXCITED TO GET ON THE SCALE. Pick your jaws up off the floor people, I'm sure it won't last.
That is all.
I noticed today on the way to get my daughter from school that I drive right by a Daylight Donuts. I didn't even know this town had one! Funny that I never noticed it when I could run in and get one....or two.
Even though I just started this diet on Monday, I have to weigh in tomorrow, and then Thursdays will be my normal weigh in days. Since I have to get up super duper early, I got measured tonight (hubby is doing it). If his measuring is correct (which we are both questioning) I've lost 5 inches. Oh well. I have an idea of what my weight will be in the morning. Let's just say I can't wait for my first weigh in. I'm actually excited to get on the scale. Yup, I said I'M EXCITED TO GET ON THE SCALE. Pick your jaws up off the floor people, I'm sure it won't last.
That is all.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Day 2 - For Better or Worse
Today was better than yesterday in most ways, but was worse in a lot of ways. Let's deal with the negative first.
I had to go into the office today. It was hard. The food didn't bother me so much, it was that I couldn't chew gum. I ALWAYS have gum in my mouth when I'm at work. I need to check with my coach to see if there is anything she suggests. I also struggled with people today. I was in a great mood when I got there, and by the time I left I wanted to hurt someone. I can't tell if it's the diet, the hormones, or the fact that one of the people I work with really wants to see me fired. Either way, I'm crabby now and I have a headache, and I'm really missing my wine. I also got tired of defending myself and why I chose this diet. I heard the, "It's not healthy", "You're starving yourself", "You're going to gain it back", "You aren't fat enough to go to such extreme measures." I could list all the comments I had to this, but we'd be here all day. Of course, most of this was at lunch, but ultimately I walked away full, happy, and confident.....which I guess puts it into the positive category. All of the food I ate today sucked. I am definitely going to have to tweak it. I literally gagged down my morning drink. I talked to a gal at work who did the program, and she suggested adding Splenda. I really wanted to avoid sweeteners of any kind, but I guess if I can't stomach it, I'll have no choice.
Now on to the positive....
I was not NEAR as hungry today. I drank way over the required amount of water at work alone. I feel like I was literally peeing pounds off (which, I probably was). I swear, every time I went to the bathroom today, I felt thinner. I still enjoyed my salad. I really do like vegetables and lettuce. I don't see myself getting sick of them at all. That is a big positive since you have to eat so many on this program. All in all, I'm feeling more confident today than I was yesterday. I have no desire to cheat. I didn't even think of it one time. In fact, someone ate chicken fried rice in front of me today (mean!) and the only thing I thought was....how can I make this IP friendly? I am pretty sure I'm close to ketosis already. I was freezing today, while everyone else was sweating. I kind of have a funky taste in my mouth. Could it be....so soon? I think tonight I'll research some recipes and figure out some ways to make these packets seem like "real food".
Onward to day 3...
I had to go into the office today. It was hard. The food didn't bother me so much, it was that I couldn't chew gum. I ALWAYS have gum in my mouth when I'm at work. I need to check with my coach to see if there is anything she suggests. I also struggled with people today. I was in a great mood when I got there, and by the time I left I wanted to hurt someone. I can't tell if it's the diet, the hormones, or the fact that one of the people I work with really wants to see me fired. Either way, I'm crabby now and I have a headache, and I'm really missing my wine. I also got tired of defending myself and why I chose this diet. I heard the, "It's not healthy", "You're starving yourself", "You're going to gain it back", "You aren't fat enough to go to such extreme measures." I could list all the comments I had to this, but we'd be here all day. Of course, most of this was at lunch, but ultimately I walked away full, happy, and confident.....which I guess puts it into the positive category. All of the food I ate today sucked. I am definitely going to have to tweak it. I literally gagged down my morning drink. I talked to a gal at work who did the program, and she suggested adding Splenda. I really wanted to avoid sweeteners of any kind, but I guess if I can't stomach it, I'll have no choice.
Now on to the positive....
I was not NEAR as hungry today. I drank way over the required amount of water at work alone. I feel like I was literally peeing pounds off (which, I probably was). I swear, every time I went to the bathroom today, I felt thinner. I still enjoyed my salad. I really do like vegetables and lettuce. I don't see myself getting sick of them at all. That is a big positive since you have to eat so many on this program. All in all, I'm feeling more confident today than I was yesterday. I have no desire to cheat. I didn't even think of it one time. In fact, someone ate chicken fried rice in front of me today (mean!) and the only thing I thought was....how can I make this IP friendly? I am pretty sure I'm close to ketosis already. I was freezing today, while everyone else was sweating. I kind of have a funky taste in my mouth. Could it be....so soon? I think tonight I'll research some recipes and figure out some ways to make these packets seem like "real food".
Onward to day 3...
Monday, January 16, 2012
Day 1 - Starvation, Hormones, and Soy Patties
Day 1 is almost done, and I would consider it a success. By some cruel twist of fate, I started my period today. I had no idea when it would come because I've been having some issues and had a D&C about 3 weeks ago. So...I'm having all these symptoms (fatigue, hunger, headaches) but I don't know if it's my body going into "shock" or if it's my period. Either way...I guess I'll say it's a good thing because I can't blame it on the diet! :)
I had chocolate drink this morning for breakfast. I was cold, so I put it in the microwave, and it tasted like hot chocolate....very tasty! I was definitely ready for lunch though. I had a wonderful salad with green peppers, cucumbers, and celery, and a couple pickles. I also made an IP soy patty. I don't know if I cooked it wrong, mixed it wrong, of if they are just nasty. The flavor was good (I used some garlic powder on it) but it was so GRAINY. I ended up crumbling into tiny pieces and mixing it with my salad, which made it tolerable, at the very least. It did fill me up, though. This afternoon the snacking bug hit hard, and I went ahead and had my evening snack. I had the IP Dill Pickle Zippers and they ROCKED! That satisfied me for the rest of the day. Supper is still cooking, but we're having chicken breast, broccoli, and I'll of course have my huge salad. I made my own dressing, and I used oil and vinegar with just a tiny bit of Italian seasoning. It is so good. I don't think I'll miss my Dorothy Lynch much! I can honestly say that right now, I'm the normal hungry for this time of day, which makes me feel better because this morning was HARD.
My hormones went nuts today. I had a couple emotional breakdowns where I really felt sorry for myself. I cried a little and thought about the kids' brownies in the kitchen. Instead of heading for the brownies, though, I re-read what I wrote last night. I've decided I have no reason to feel sorry for myself. I can do this. I will do this.
I had chocolate drink this morning for breakfast. I was cold, so I put it in the microwave, and it tasted like hot chocolate....very tasty! I was definitely ready for lunch though. I had a wonderful salad with green peppers, cucumbers, and celery, and a couple pickles. I also made an IP soy patty. I don't know if I cooked it wrong, mixed it wrong, of if they are just nasty. The flavor was good (I used some garlic powder on it) but it was so GRAINY. I ended up crumbling into tiny pieces and mixing it with my salad, which made it tolerable, at the very least. It did fill me up, though. This afternoon the snacking bug hit hard, and I went ahead and had my evening snack. I had the IP Dill Pickle Zippers and they ROCKED! That satisfied me for the rest of the day. Supper is still cooking, but we're having chicken breast, broccoli, and I'll of course have my huge salad. I made my own dressing, and I used oil and vinegar with just a tiny bit of Italian seasoning. It is so good. I don't think I'll miss my Dorothy Lynch much! I can honestly say that right now, I'm the normal hungry for this time of day, which makes me feel better because this morning was HARD.
My hormones went nuts today. I had a couple emotional breakdowns where I really felt sorry for myself. I cried a little and thought about the kids' brownies in the kitchen. Instead of heading for the brownies, though, I re-read what I wrote last night. I've decided I have no reason to feel sorry for myself. I can do this. I will do this.
Sunday, January 15, 2012
The Skinny of A Fatty
My very first post on my blog about going from fat to skinny. Wow. I've done a lot of self reflecting over the weekend and thought a lot about how I've gone from normal to fat, and how it has affected me physically and emotionally. This blog is a big step for me...putting it all out there for anyone in cyberspace to find...but I think it is a necessary step, and just one more tool that will keep me accountable while I embark on this journey. So, to start, I'd like to just jot down some of the conclusions I've made about myself.
1. I eat out of boredom. I eat at night, when I'm the only one awake, and I have nothing better to do. Most of the time, I feel really crappy about myself the next day.
2. I've gained 11 pounds in 5 years. Not bad, really, considering that my eating habits could use some improvement. I do have poor eating habits. I will not make excuses for myself anymore. Generally, though, I don't eat BAD. I eat healthy meals most days, but my portions could use some attention. And then there is that whole boredom thing.....
3. My body has changed drastically since the birth of my 2nd child. The weight didn't come off as easy as it did with my first. In fact, it didn't come off at all....and even though I've only gained 11, I look and FEEL like I've gained 50.
4. I'm genetically predisposed to being fat. Yup, it's true. Sorry fam, but you know it. This is not a bad thing, but it is going to be a way for me to remind myself that I can't do what I want. I have to watch it more closely than others. It's not an excuse to be fat, it's an excuse to watch what goes in your mouth.
5. I have to be held accountable. If I'm not told what to eat and when to eat it, I'll cheat. I've been there a million times before, and it never works out. This time....I'm following a plan. It will work. I will learn how to eat right, and I will make it a lifestyle change. I'm tired of the yo-yo weights. I'm tired of dieting when no one else is. I'm tired of hiding and not being the person I feel like I should be because I am fat.
6. I don't make friends easily. I always say it's because I'm anti-social. Really, it's probably just another excuse. I don't make friends easily because I feel really crappy about myself, and I always swear people are judging me and talking about me...all because I have zero self confidence....because I'm a fatty.
7. I AM FAT AND I AM NOT HAPPY BEING FAT. This is a big one for me...hence the caps!
8. I want to be able to walk up a hill without being short of breath. I went to a football game a couple years ago, and while my husband and friends were gracefully trekking up hills to get to the stadium, I had to take breaks and COULD NOT BREATH. I was so embarrassed, yet I made excuses for myself. I think back about that day now and wonder why I waited so long to do something about it....
So, those are the major things. There are many more. MANY.....MANY.....MANY more. Maybe one day I'll get into them....maybe not. For now, I start the Ideal Protein diet TOMORROW. It will work. I will succeed....and look out everyone, because in approximately 8 months, I will be a skinny bitch. I will not look like this EVER AGAIN......
1. I eat out of boredom. I eat at night, when I'm the only one awake, and I have nothing better to do. Most of the time, I feel really crappy about myself the next day.
2. I've gained 11 pounds in 5 years. Not bad, really, considering that my eating habits could use some improvement. I do have poor eating habits. I will not make excuses for myself anymore. Generally, though, I don't eat BAD. I eat healthy meals most days, but my portions could use some attention. And then there is that whole boredom thing.....
3. My body has changed drastically since the birth of my 2nd child. The weight didn't come off as easy as it did with my first. In fact, it didn't come off at all....and even though I've only gained 11, I look and FEEL like I've gained 50.
4. I'm genetically predisposed to being fat. Yup, it's true. Sorry fam, but you know it. This is not a bad thing, but it is going to be a way for me to remind myself that I can't do what I want. I have to watch it more closely than others. It's not an excuse to be fat, it's an excuse to watch what goes in your mouth.
5. I have to be held accountable. If I'm not told what to eat and when to eat it, I'll cheat. I've been there a million times before, and it never works out. This time....I'm following a plan. It will work. I will learn how to eat right, and I will make it a lifestyle change. I'm tired of the yo-yo weights. I'm tired of dieting when no one else is. I'm tired of hiding and not being the person I feel like I should be because I am fat.
6. I don't make friends easily. I always say it's because I'm anti-social. Really, it's probably just another excuse. I don't make friends easily because I feel really crappy about myself, and I always swear people are judging me and talking about me...all because I have zero self confidence....because I'm a fatty.
7. I AM FAT AND I AM NOT HAPPY BEING FAT. This is a big one for me...hence the caps!
8. I want to be able to walk up a hill without being short of breath. I went to a football game a couple years ago, and while my husband and friends were gracefully trekking up hills to get to the stadium, I had to take breaks and COULD NOT BREATH. I was so embarrassed, yet I made excuses for myself. I think back about that day now and wonder why I waited so long to do something about it....
So, those are the major things. There are many more. MANY.....MANY.....MANY more. Maybe one day I'll get into them....maybe not. For now, I start the Ideal Protein diet TOMORROW. It will work. I will succeed....and look out everyone, because in approximately 8 months, I will be a skinny bitch. I will not look like this EVER AGAIN......
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